Goodbye 2020

I think most people are happy to see 2020 in the rearview mirror this year, and I can’t say it’s been the best for me either. My one New Years resolution to see Amy fell through in the midst of travel restrictions and Alex being out of work for 6 months. (Guess what my resolution is for ’21? That’s right, see Amy for goodness sake). It wasn’t just Amy’s travel plans that fell through, but several plans to see friends and family came crashing to the ground and made me so often feel isolated and alone. We struggled with finding a home church. We struggled with fear. We struggled with an overabundance of time and not enough good things to fill it with. My wisdom teeth have literally decided to rear their ugly heads and cause me occasional headaches.

But I can’t look back and say it was all bad. I started the year thinking that I just couldn’t take the pre-Covid isolation and loneliness of Midland much longer, and have come out the other side thinking I’d be hesitant to move elsewhere. I have found some friends. I have realized just how amazing the job I have is and how much I love working there and the coworkers I am surrounded with. Even with COVID I’ve managed to travel to Montana and see a friend married, my new nephew, the blessings that still seem to come even amidst a world that seems to be so broken.

I wish I could say I’ve grown a lot in this time, but I’m not sure I have. I’ve coped, and I’ve managed, and I’ve made some progress in a few areas, while also continuing the same struggles in many others. I haven’t made the most of this year. I haven’t even made an average amount in this year. But I’ve still progressed, especially in finding friends and being more content where I am, and those are two very big wins for me.

I know a lot of change could still be coming my way (will Alex find a job somewhere else entirely and all my progress settling into Midland go out the window? Stay tuned to find out, I guess?) and I still have a lot of growth to achieve, and my goal this year is to take whatever happens, good or bad, easy or hard, and direct it towards God, who is bigger than whatever 2021 can throw at me.

New Years Resolution 2020

It’s that time of year where I usually sit down and reject concrete resolutions and instead set some personal development goals. Past years have seen me working on being more open with my feelings and shortcomings, bracing for upcoming change, or just hoping to keep on a positive track.

This year is different. This year I have a concrete resolution.

I WILL see Amy Buchmeyer in 2020.

It’s been way too long. She’s one of the dearest people in my life and I desperately want to sit down with her, enjoy a cup of tea, and talk all things life. And maybe get up to a classic Amy & Tori scheme and adventure.

An actual reflective post on 2019/2020 and an update on my Christmas visit to Montana are forthcoming. But for now I’m scheming on how to get half way across the country for a visit.